Caption Competition – EastEnders’ Janine

Hello and welcome to today’s edition of A Slice Of Soap. As some of you may know, last year I was sadly forced to end my original Friday fun feature ‘Gus Watch’ due to actor Mohammed George leaving EastEnders. I toyed with the idea of a similar replacement – nearly coming back with ‘Dev Watch’ – before concluding that Gus Watch was one of a kind.

So, in honour of our hero Gus, each Friday I will present a Caption Competition. Now, before you all get excited, there is no physical prize. Instead, there is something far more worth winning: it’s better than Nando’s! It’s better than X Factor! It’s better than winning the lottery! It’s The Gus Smith Seal Of Approval. Albert Square’s poet gets another outing and here he is:

Before anyone gets all pedantic on me, his speech bubble is a thought bubble, technically speaking. But as this is a soap blog, I wanted to do something that put people in mind of soap bubbles (cos this is a soap blog), so I’ve used a thought one instead.  This week’s picture is EastEnders’ Janine. I’m sure you all know the rules by now. Just leave a funny caption by clicking ‘add a comment’. The winner will be announced next Friday. You can enter as many times as you like. I’ll kick off with my contribution….
"Ewwwwwwww! Who let Minty in here?"
In today’s soap news, former Corrie actor Chris Bisson is set to make a guest appearance in Casualty. You can read all about it here:
That’s it for me, I’m out of here. Join me on Monday for a full preview of your favourite soaps. Got a comment about your favourite soap, this blog or anything else? Share it with me.

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59 Responses to Caption Competition – EastEnders’ Janine

  1. lucy says:

    uuuurrrrrrggggggghhhhhhh who left Squeal Beale\’s head down there?

  2. lucy says:

    oooooops toilet is the other way!!!

  3. Kitty says:

    "That bloody Ian Beale. I can\’t cook soup in the loo!"

  4. zeni says:

    if only pat hadnt used it before droppin her earring down it.

  5. Colin says:

    I knew it was a bad idea teaching Terence how to use the toilet

  6. James says:

    oh my! who flushed my ego down this toilet?

  7. kristina says:

    Yeuch! Ive not felt this quessy since kissing Ian Beale.

  8. stickgal says:

    I was wondering where they put the old plot-lines…….

  9. Alan says:

    I\’ve just had another economic disaster. I\’ve just dropped 10p down the lavatory

  10. Steven W. says:

    "Im pushing …but it won\’t go down"!

  11. Sehr says:

    I wonder if there\’s any money down there… ewww it\’s not worth it!

  12. Alan says:

    "No more curried eggs for me!"(It\’s an old Goon Show gag involving one Major Bloodnock (Peter Sellers) who was always beset by digestive problems, involving loud explosions)

  13. allan says:

    This is worse than the crap they show on the program

  14. Kitty says:

    "Ew! I\’d rather shag Ian Beale!"

  15. Ally x says:

    urrr take a BUTCHER\’S AT THAT!!!

  16. Jackie says:

    Must stop using eau de toilette as my perfume

  17. sarah says:

    any gagging joe swash can do, i can do better!

  18. Siobhan says:

    "Watch this space, I will com up smelling of roses".

  19. Ian says:

    One hand in my pink, the other hand in the stink!

  20. alishaa says:

    hey, Ronnie! i\’m gonna be sick! where\’s Ian? do ya thinks his bra will be big enough??!

  21. Eleanor says:

    \’ere Billy, I know we\’re squatting, but can we not afford a cooker?

  22. Justine says:

    Mummy,I didnt want to do a poo here I wanted to do a poo at paul\’s house. Now do you see why i wanted to go and do a poo at pauil\’s house!!!!!

  23. Justine says:

    If I had known how far down the toilet my career had nose dived i would never have tried to get it back!!!

  24. Justine says:

    Is this what the bbc refer to as toilet humour… Johnathon are you and Russel still down down there??

  25. Justine says:

    blimy with skid marks like these … who needs enemies??

  26. Ian says:

    well i was in prison been called a old scrubber… but never thought i be actually scrubbing toilet pans for the mitchells …those mitchells got a lot to answer for …Barry u still down there all is forgiven my love i think his remains just been flushed up the sewer…quick give me that toilet brush…blimey Barry what the hell have u been eating since u passed over?and i think i just saw a big floater ,has pat been sitting on the throne again?

  27. Justine says:

    Ewwwwugh.. I sware i recognise that sweetcorn from Ian\’s cafe!!!!

  28. Luca says:

    The R&R bog-candyfloss machine wasn\’t quite the crowd pleaser that Ronnie expected.

  29. Private says:

    Are there no depth\’s that Harry Hill wont sink to for a TV Burp exclusive…….?

  30. Sam says:

    My god no wonder it nearly split me in half, even beating it back with a stick it still wont flush!!!!!

  31. mary says:

    Yeuch!! I don\’t remember eating that, \’ave a look!

  32. Samir says:

    I never knew Billy meant it litetally when he called me a S**T stirrer!

  33. Gregory says:

    i am fishing for my supper billy were is the freynng pan

  34. Philly says:

    That looks like Barry…he\’s come back!!

  35. janet says:

    "Was it a Star Wars night last night Billy? Because i\’ve just come across the Captains Log"

  36. philip says:

    ah my precious so am i now lord of the ring

  37. Robert says:

    This job is so beneath me. Can someone call Kim and Aggie please?

  38. jeannie says:

    ahhh seyd ahhh coughed an mah teef went darn the bog!!

  39. Sonja says:

    Whoever taught Wellard to go in the bog needs shootin\’!

  40. Unknown says:

    "dirty den\’s back again?! eurgh.. this time he really is dirty."

  41. Kathryn says:


  42. BOB says:


  43. Soap Blogger says:

    That\’s it guys. This competition is now closed. I will award the very first Gus Smith Seal Of Approval soon.

  44. Alex says:

    im havin a bit of trouble pushin him down toilet,time to get the plunger i reckon

  45. george says:

    who ever did that one,must have done it for the hole of england.

  46. gavin says:

    Thats what i think of the new story plots

  47. Jean says:

    My dad always said start at the bottom but its floating on the top

  48. I Am says:

    OMG My shit smells as bad as my breath!!

  49. Elaine says:

    Its a mini Barbara Windsor hanging from the rim.

  50. dee says:

    this one reminds me of barry

  51. neil says:

    I thought Ronnie meant the Hollywood Bowl

  52. Maala says:

    I have to find a new husband, money money money! its amazing what depths you have to go to!

  53. Maala says:

    These gloves just do not match my outfit, its making me feel sooooo sick

  54. Maala says:

    I found the end of the rainbow, just a little more digging and I will be there

  55. dawn says:

    I knew pretending too be Jewish would come back too haunt me

  56. dawn says:

    Don\’t tell Billy this is where Jay\’s hiding

  57. joanne says:

    nobody told me R n R stood for rubber gloves n rim block……

  58. Sarah says:

    just as janine entered the toilet at the R and R she discovered ronnie hiding under the toilet seat.trying to hide the evidence from jack she flushes the chain and tries to scrub any evidence ofronnie ever being there from the toilet bowl….BARF!

  59. Scarlett says:

    why did i take up this hobby. a.k.a pulling faces

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