A Jailbird Turns Up On Corrie

Hello and Welcome To A Slice Of Soap. So what’s going on in soapland this week? Let’s find out.

Coronation Street w/e Friday November 14

Just when you thought David ‘Damien’ Platt was being a good boy after his spell inside, it looks like his dodgy side will rear its ugly head again. His promises that he’ll turn over a new leaf may well wear a bit thin thanks to his cellmate Grahame Proctor (a role played by actor Craig Gazey). Y’see Grahame gets out of the young offenders institute and shows up looking for somewhere to call home. David reckons he owes him a favour so he persuades Gail to give him a room (her place is rapidly turning into a doss-house for kids estranged from their parents). He promises that Grahame will be no trouble…and that’s our cue that he’ll be nothing but that.

The after effects of John’s (stupid and unbelievable) actions are being felt by both Rosie and Fiz. Kirk’s starting to wonder if it’s the right time for him and Chesney to go off to South Africa. Dan-Dan the boring bookie man (go! Hurry up and go!) introduces himself to Peter and asks if he’d be interested in a business transaction. Tony’s keeping quiet about raiding the payroll account. Peter’s still struggling with being a dad and calls a social worker to take Simon away. The Underworld staff demand to know what’s happened to their wages. Gail and Joe are still skulking around trying to keep their romance a secret. Sally and Tony are concerned when a journalist comes to the factory looking for Rosie. Grahame’s shocked when he finds out that David’s been winding up one of Weatherfield’s hardest families – he warns him to stay away.

Also on Coronation Street this week:
Peter’s visit to Lucy’s solicitor proves extremely lucrative
Fiz is off to South Africa
Tara confronts Dev

Hollyoaks w/e Friday November 14

Are you keeping up with the revolving door in Hollywoodoaks? People are coming and going quicker than high street banks. The latest to go is Emma Rigby who has quit the show after nearly four years. The 19-year-old, who was named Best Actress at this year’s British Soap Awards, is to leave early next year to have a crack at Hollywood. How many soap actors have said that now? I’m losing count. Anyway Emma, whose character Hannah Ashworth battled anorexia in a hard-hitting storyline, said: "I just feel that the time is right to move on and hopefully get into dramas and films as I love to play different roles." Time will tell if she manages to do so. Back to the action and with Tina laid to rest and all the McQueen family’s secrets out in the open, is the worst now over for them? Of course not because new Mcqueen Theresa, Myra’s 15-year-old niece, is due to make her appearance soon. Rumour has it that she’s gonna be trouble with a capital T.

Back to this weeks action and Cindy’s out for revenge after her run-in with Louise. Tony vows to get his life back on track. Cindy continues her tirade at Warren and Louise. The Roys move house and take over the reins from the Ashworths. Lauren dreads other pupils discovering that her brother’s a policeman. Elliot happily listens to Rhys’ tales from the MTV awards. Malachy attempts to organise Eamon’s funeral with Kris. Mandy wakes after spending the night with Tony, and immediately regrets her actions. Justin’s in for a shock when he hears that Neville has new tenants lined up for the flat. Lauren’s keen to get closer to Newt and wants to consummate their relationship. Dom’s excited about starting afresh in a new pad in Hollyoaks and Michaela’s desperate to get her family back on speaking terms.

Also on Hollyoaks this week:
Tony’s furious that Mercedes has moved in
Newt and Lauren embark on a plan to cause trouble
It’s all systems go for Louise with the wedding plans

EastEnders w/e Friday November 14

Big, big, big news for I’m A Celebrity…Get Me Out Of Here! fans. When it comes to betting on who might be eating kangaroo anus and crocodile penis, a good place to start is always soap rejects. You probably won’t be surprised to learn that ex-EastEnder Joe Swash – best known as EastEnder wideboy Mickey Miller – is rumoured to be packed and ready to fly to Australia. An ITV source revealed: "For years he was at the centre of the London party scene and TV bosses are hoping he’ll spill the beans on some of his famous conquests." Errrrr…what’s the point of that? They can’t and won’t broadcast any kiss-and-tells for fear of libel so we viewers won’t know about his supposed-conquests anyway. Joe, 26, was axed from EastEnders in February and hasn’t been seen on TV since he left the soap in July.

Back to the soap in question and the who was it "what’ ran over   Max Branning" (as Dot would incorrectly say) saga goes on. I’m not really interested, I have to admit. This one just hasn’t caught my imagination. Anyway, Lauren wants to reveal all to the police but Tanya tries to stop her. Sean lands a job on a building site. Ian’s encouraging Jane with her comedy (oh for pete’s sake!!!) and she gets a surprise when her mother turns up. Phil and Archie think that Sean’s got something to do with the burglary; Roxy is outraged until she finds some money in Sean’s coat.

Dot urges Bradley to see his father. It’s Children In Need and the residents in Albert Square are doing their best to raise money (that’s a hint to us, the viewing public, to dig deep. I will – will you? What’s more – don’t forget that there will be no Friday episode due to the Children In Need broadcast). Sean disappears and Roxy has to make a decision about their future.

Also on EastEnders this week:
Tamwar tries to persuade his parents to buy the Minute Mart
The police have a witness to the hit-and-run
Christian returns to Albert Square

Emmerdale w/e Friday November 14

It’s coming up to Christmas and the soaps will pile on the misery. What with the credit crunch and jobs disappearing and two wars overseas and the economy in bad shape, I’m depressed enough thank you very much. However, with numerous cast members set to fly the nest in the rural soap, it will give the writers the opportunity to ramp up the death factor. Oh what fun! This week, Debbie’s appalled to hear from Chas that Jasmine’s gone to the MacFarlane’s club to get information for her exposé. Rodney tries to convince Lily that she needs to go through with the operation or risk losing her life. In Tuesday’s one-hour episode, Jasmine gets fired and she also gets seduced by Shane. Nicola has a final attempt at ruining the choir’s chances at the competition heats. Everything goes wrong just as the church assessor arrives…

Pollard guesses what David and Nicola are up to after finding an article on converting a church into apartments. Shane and Jasmine enjoy a drink together following their night of passion. Brenda’s stunned when Val makes jibes about her weight and considers joining a gym to impress Terry. Nicola’s delighted after her work with the choir paves the way for a reconciliation with Rodney. Brenda thinks twice about the cabbage diet after suffering with trapped wind (the worst one is wind after eating Brussel sprouts, you guys know what I’m talking about, right?). Terry and Brenda are both on edge after their abortive date. At Pear Tree, Carl’s put in his place by Jimmy after expressing his doubts about Matthew and Anna’s relationship.

Also on Emmerdale this week:
Shane warns Jasmine that she’s playing with fire
Lily quits her job at the factory
A drunken Terry does something he regrets

That’s it for now. Join me on Wednesday for more soap news and gossip. Got a comment about your favourite soap, this blog or anything else? Share it with me.

Please note that the ‘add a comment’ facility will be turned off at midnight in order to cut down on spam from the Far East. It will be turned back on at 9am

Official Sites
Coronation Street
Emmerdale
EastEnders
Hollyoaks

Ms Bubbles
MSN’s Eye On Soaps
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