Billy Hits Rock Bottom On EastEnders

Hello and welcome to A Slice of Soap. Let’s get to it.

EastEnders w/e Dec 14

It’s the run up to Christmas so get ready for misery. Then again, isn’t that always the way on EastEnders? Billy’s still desperate to keep a roof over his family’s heads. He’s trying to make money but is running out of options fast. The poor man’s floundering – what can he do to save him and Honey from being turned out on the street before Christmas? Dot is aghast when she reads Jamaican patois in the nativity script and she’s also horrified to see skateboarding angels. Yolande explains the nativity has been given a modern twist, innit?

Expect a bunch of chavs as the Three Wise Men and instead of Gold, Frankincense And Myrrh, they’ll be bringing a Burberry cap, jewellery from Argos and a Chelsea season ticket.

Elsewhere, Steven gets Bradley and Stacey to go out on a night with him to celebrate his birthday, but can Steven be trusted? We all know the answer to that question, don’t we? Peggy’s in a temper because the club is taking her business and she’s blaming Jack and wants Phil to sort him out. It looks like Phil’s gonna have to do things the old-fashioned way…know what I mean? Baby alert! After the awful Honey birth, we now have the equally terrible Tanya one. Why are soap births always a disaster? Some women manage to have smooth births y’know!

Also on EastEnders:
Ronnie’s suspicions about Jack get the better of her.
Jack is causing friction in the Square.
Peggy’s charity box is stolen.

Hollyoaks w/e Dec 14

More from the soap with the beautiful people – little wonder I’ve taken to calling it ‘Hollywoodoaks’. On to the action and Jake is disappointed when Nancy scoffs at his idea for a naming ceremony for Charlie. When she tells him that she’s going to give Newt extra tutorials, Jake packs his bags and leaves.  Jacqui and Mercedes are stunned when Carmel tells them that the shop-lifting, fiddling with utilities and benefit fraud have to stop now that she’s dating a cop. That’s just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to things these girls need to stop doing…

Nancy is determined to find out why Jake moved out, but he makes it clear that she’s had her final chance. Darren reminds Jessica that it’s over between them, but she tries to convince him that she never meant for Zoe to find out about them.  Meanwhile Ste persuades Fletch to skip sixth form. Unable to resist the offer of drugs, Fletch relaxes with Ste until Amy unexpectedly returns. Looks like Fletch has got some explaining to do. Also on ‘Hollywoodoaks’, Darren’s loan shark tells him he’ll harm Zoe if he doesn’t receive his money straight away. Desperate, Darren resorts to theft, but everyone thinks that Newt is the thief. Jake is pleased when Nancy dresses conservatively for Charlie’s naming ceremony, and Nancy is stunned as Jake produces a ring and proposes to her. But Steph notices something odd about the ring…

Also on Hollyoaks:
The reality of Ste and Amy’s dire financial situation hits home.
Frankie discovers some of her jewellery is missing.
Darren is mugged in broad daylight.

Coronation Street w/e Dec 14  

On Coronation Street this week, Michelle’s anxious about Ryan’s stalker. Liam confronts the man who’s been following his nephew and the stranger reveals some shocking news. Now as this storyline has already been broadcast in the tabloids, you don’t need to be a MENSA brain to work out what the news is. However, I still don’t buy this story arc as I think it’s too contrived – it’s too obviously a ratings ploy. All storylines are, of course, but at least make them a bit more subtle and believable.

Anyway, whatever. Elsewhere Sarah tries to make Gail feel guilty but as the squabbling siblings continue to bicker, Gail’s convinced she’s done the right thing.  Audrey arrives back from the airport with Stephen, who’s decided to spend Christmas with his mum (how convenient as Sarah needs to be written out). Jim is pleasantly surprised when Steve offers him a job and Michelle’s totally baffled by the news about Ryan.  Meanwhile Sarah’s getting tired of ‘Damian’ David sucking up to Stephen and is annoyed when he offers her brother a dream job in Italy. Rosie decides to cancel her plans and stay in when she hears John’s coming round (why Rosie? Why? You can do so much better than him). Ryan’s frustrated that he’s still under house arrest by Michelle and hopes he can still go to the gaming competition at the weekend. Will Michelle ease up?

Also on Coronation Street:
Lauren asks Eileen if she can move in.
Liam is angry when Carla reveals that Maria’s pregnant.
Vera hears some bad news from Jack.

Emmerdale w/e Dec 14

Gray sneakily plants false evidence on Matthew and he’s arrested and charged with murder. Has Gray finally nailed his nemesis? Paul is distraught when he has to tell Val he’s moving away. Carrie tells Scarlett that a 16th birthday party is out of the question and elsewhere, auditions for Belle’s Christmas play are in full swing. Victoria posts an open invitation to Scarlett’s 16th birthday online. Guess what’s going to happen? You are absolutely correct if you said that everyone has a ‘smashing’ time. Helping a drunken Scarlett tidy up, Daz shares a passionate kiss with her only to be broken up by Carrie and Jimmy coming home. Have the two young friends found love?

Sarah goes missing and Jo is distraught. Jimmy threatens Daz over Scarlett. Sam is stuck when Debbie is unable to offer him work and his financial situation deteriorates. Andy tells a delighted Jo he wants to set a date for the wedding. However, he wants her to adopt Sarah. Lisa discovers that Sam has been unable to pay Samson’s nursery fees but he borrows money from Eli on the condition that he doesn’t tell the other Dingles. Will Sam regret an alliance with Eli?

Also on Emmerdale:
Diane confides in Val that her marriage is over.
Scarlett and Daz agree to remain friends
Andy is angry with Jo.

Official Sites
Coronation Street
Emmerdale
EastEnders
Hollyoaks

That’s it for now. Join me on Wednesday for more soap gossip. Got a comment about your favourite soap, this blog or anything else? Share it with me.

Ms Bubbles
MSN’s Eye On Soaps

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2 Responses to Billy Hits Rock Bottom On EastEnders

  1. Paul says:

    I feel really sad and depressed for the fact that I know this,  but I remember Stephens Birth,  and he was born on 26th December, (St Stephens day) hence the name…Aaaagghhhhhhh!  I am now officially old, sad and probably irrelevant to everyone.

  2. John Kerr says:

    Why oh Why can\’t one of the \’Enders cast have a Happy Christmas?  Poor Billy no mates always seems to end up spending a portion of the festive period huddled in a doorway awaiting the angels of mercy to help him out.  Surely the writers could cut him a break for Christmas?  They have already given him the dumbest wife in the free world, a disabled daughter, money problems, a near death child birth and a face that could curdle milk!  When will the pity finally kick in and afford Billy a bit of festive cheer?  Lets start a campaign for the writers at BBC HQ to give Billy a great 2008.  Remember folks, A Loser is for life…not just for Christmas.

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