Pass The Dutchie Pon De Lef’ ‘And Side

 
Hello Soapsters, welcome to another slice of soap. Let’s get to it… 
 
It’s been quite an eventful few days in Albert Square. Half of the inhabitants contracted food poisoning from Ian’s out-of-date fish; Stacey and Chelsea came to blows at the annual Albert Square ‘Fun Day’ and Sean ‘shout!’ Slater arranged some brutal revenge on Deano from his prison cell. But the image that made a bigger mark on me was Patrick all tooled up on Monday night’s episode. That knock on the head must have caused more damage than we all initially thought. As I watched Patrick practicing his Bruce Lee Kung Fu moves in front of the mirror, I couldn’t help but think, yes man….Patrick’s turned rude bwoy…Shaft is back! Remember the theme song? Instead of: ‘Who’s the black private dick, that’s a sex machine to all the chicks? – Shaft! Can you dig it?’, we’ll all be singing: ‘Who’s the black shop owner, whose nagging wife’s an endless moaner – Trueman! You get me?’
 
Patrick getting hit over the head by some unknown individual just wouldn’t happen in real life. What self-respecting Caribbean shop owner would be in his shop without a whopping great big machette somewhere near by? You know…for scaling fish and chopping  up mangoes and ting.
 
In all seriousness, I still feel that the EastEnders writers need to do a bit more research into the background of some of their ethnic characters. Take Yolande, for example. Take her and put her on the first Space Shuttle blasting off Earth and leave her there; in space no one would hear her moan. That’s all the woman does – moan, moan, moan. Patrick probably hit himself over the head to get the sympathy vote from her and shut her up. Anyway, Yolande is just the latest in a long line of unconvincing black characters on EastEnders (remember the Taverniers? Celestine and Etta?). And can anybody please tell me exactly where in the Caribbean Patrick’s accent originates from? Is it Jamaica? St Lucia? Antigua? Grenada? Trinidad? Barbadooooos? Surely wherever it is, the people don’t end every single sentence with the words "nuh man"? Do you EastEnders writers understand what I mean…nuh man? Not all Caribbean people end their sentences with those two words! DO YOUR RESEARCH…nuh man!
  
Gus Watch:
The hand of fear struck as I thought the EastEnders writers were finally writing our hero Gus out of  the show. It came when Big Mo squashed something underneath that table: it turned out to be Charlie Slater’s marrow (EastEnders does rubbish comedy). What did the marrow do to deserve such a violent death? That marrow was a damn sight more useful to the show than Gus could ever be. Maybe they’ll re-enact the scene at next year’s Fun Day? It could go something like this…Our hero Gus is busy sweeping the streets of Walford while everyone else is enjoying themselves at the annual Fun Day. Suddenly, Charlie Slater’s marrow finds itself trapped underneath Big Mo’s table. Seeing that the marrow is in great danger, Gus puts down his broom and quickly dives under the table in a desperate attempt to rescue it (now here’s where it all gets exciting). Heather (you know, the cross between Big Daddy and Giant Haystacks) happens to be passing by and slips on a bit of Ian Beale’s out-of-date fish killing both the marrow and poor old Gus. Now that’s what I call a storyline.  
 
That’s it for now.  I’m off to have a word with the EastEnders scriptwriters. See you all on Friday with some more soap gossip. Got a comment about your favourite soap, this blog or anything else? Share it with me here.
 
Ms Bubbles
MSN’s Eye On Soaps
 
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12 Responses to Pass The Dutchie Pon De Lef’ ‘And Side

  1. Colleen and Lucy says:

     lol too funny….nuh man! EastEnders are rubbish at all their black characers and their Indian ones too.

  2. bri says:

    Eastenders PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE get new writers, Preferably ones that have multicultual backgrounds! 
     
    I mean Libby Fox calling Patrick Truman "Pops" makes me laugh everytime I hear her say it.
    The characters that are of ethnic background on this soap are a complete joke.
     
    (I only now watch it just to hear my Gran curse them out and \’kiss her teeth\’ while throwing her arms in the air. lol)
    I agree with  Ms Bubbles. Get Gus out, replace him with someone that isn\’t so pathetic.
     
     And another thing.. The Mitchells vs The Beale fued, it is soooooooo old, how can Ian Beale alone take them on. His own family don\’t even like him.

  3. Colleen and Lucy says:

     To be honest, most white people can\’t tell how these black characters are supposed to speak. But if you say it\’s wrong, it\’s wrong. Maybe they should get more writers from different backgrouds.

  4. Soap Blogger says:

    Hello! Thanks for your comments.  I read them all, please keep them coming.

  5. Lucretia says:

    In response to your article "Pass The Dutchie Pon De Lef\’ \’And Side" I must first of all correct your ignorance in the matter of Rudolph Walker\’s accent, his accent is indeed from Trinidad & yes Trinidadians do end most sentences with "nuh man" had you done any research at all you would\’ve known this. NOT ALL PEOPLE FROM THE CARIBBEAN HAVE A JAMAICAN ACCENT. I can see that some of what you\’d written was for laughs, the rest just is pure stereotyping & ignorance. There\’s a name for that! Even the title I found very offensive Why did it have to be a reference to cannabis? Or is that something else you didnt know? If you didnt, shame on you for not doing your research & basing your article on the premise of anothers lack of research. In ending my advice to you would be, "in pure Trini style " Doh talk about what you eh know do your research na man.

  6. Colleen and Lucy says:

    I looked up dutchie in the dictionary. It says it\’s a Dutch pot for cooking. Where\’s the cannabis reference? I agree that Eastenders needs to think about its characters more. There are too many that need to go. And Gus is one of them! 

  7. Soap Blogger says:

    Gemmy, you are quite correct – a dutchie is a pot. In response to no name (of Trinidadian heritage?) – I appear to have annoyed you. Not intentional. The title was meant to be humorous; I was recalling the Musical Youth song \’Pass The Dutchie\’, the cover version of Mighty Diamonds\’ Pass The Kutchie. I defy you to show me the cannabis reference in the title considering that the word used is \’dutchie\’. 🙂 You\’re right: not every person from the Caribbean has a Jamaican accent – we have Yolande as 100% proof of that. 🙂 

  8. patricia says:

    dont know wheh dis bout but dutchie is a caste iron pot used to cook meat and stews  and it hold di heat good.  a stop watch eastenders cause it get too boring and typecast.  get some ethnic writer in fi good story line

  9. Cahit says:

    Hi there, great blog. Eastenders? East London? and not a single Turkish, Kurdish, Greek or Turkish Cypriot  in sight? oh yes, I forgot, the laundrette owner right? A shabby representation of a great part of London with great people, shabby I tells ya…..Jay

  10. james austin says:

    wha don yuh nook de plairce mon? 

  11. sarah louise says:

    hey gorgouse add mexxxx

  12. sarah louise says:

    hey gorgouse add mexxxx

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